The first real bribe of the election campaign has been announced.

To the accompaniment of fanfares and hurrahs the boy David and his pre-pubescent would-be Chancellor (Baby George) have unveiled their plan to support marriage through a “tax break”. (It also, apparently, applies to we partnered poofs!).

We’re in line for £150 a year – or £2.88 per week – but ONLY where one partner does not use their full personal allowance, i.e. earns less than £6,475 per year.

Ooo – quick, I’m off to write my resignation and apply for a part time job at Lidl.

The Institute of Fiscal Studies has said “The incentives to marry – or not to divorce – provided by a policy whose maximum benefit is £150 a year must surely be weak relative to the other costs and benefits involved”. I’d go further and say “It’s pants”!

Conservative sources have said that “the tax break was designed to be a symbol and message – in other words a gesture. There are a few of them I’d like to make in your direction, lads, if that’s the best you can come up with!