All posts by The Fat Controller

Coronarse Virus 3

Found this on Facebook – some really sound advice!

“Make no mistake. When loved ones are removed from your home by ambulance because the virus has hit them hard, you are not going to be able to follow them there, sit by their hospital bed and hold their hand. You are not going to be able to pop in at 7.00 pm for visiting hours. They are going to have no one other than exhausted and brave hospital staff to see them through days or weeks of barely breathing through a ventilator until they either die or recover. They are not going to be well enough to text you.

You are not going to be able to phone the ward to check in on them regularly (staff will be too busy for that). During that time, they will be completely alone, while you sit at home waiting to hear whether they have made it through.

Imagine that person is someone you love dearly. Because it’s going to be a reality for many in the coming weeks.

And if that person in hospital happens to be you, going through that ordeal completely alone, it would be nothing less than terrifying.

Never in my life have I wanted so strongly to say that if anyone is not feeling even a little afraid right now, not only for themselves but for their loved ones and others in general, then they are a bloody fool.

Don’t be a fool stay safe !!!!”

CORONARSE VIRUS 2

This time it’s personal!

I had a long chat with my boss’s boss yesterday about all these shenanigans! It helps that he’s a friend and that we’ve known each other for over fifteen years, because it’s not always easy to admit that you’re scared. And I am!

One of the first people to die in the UK was a man in his early 60s with “an underlying medical condition” – or someone like me!

Most of us will remember the pig flu ten years ago. I certainly do, not least throwing up in the bath at two in the morning and then a week during which I could barely get out of bed I felt so rough. It took me several weeks to fully recover. A decade later and I’m by no means certain that I’d do as well if Covid 19 comes a-knockin’. I was diagnosed with emphysema (or COPD to those who can’t spell it!) seven years ago. It’s a long term, degenerative and terminal lung disease which also has the charming side-effect of compromising the immune system. Even on a good day I have limited lung capacity and I’m very prone to chest inflections which can severely limit my mobility. Covid 19 would be extremely dangerous for me.

Which brings me to my point. There are STILL people out there who just don’t appear to get it!

The hand-washing, the self-isolation and the social distancing have to be universal or their effect is limited. I’ve seen numerous examples in the last few days of people who say that they’ll carry on as they were because they’re at low risk and likely to survive it. Well, bully for you! But it isn’t just about you – it’s about sad old buggers like me for whom this could literally be a matter of life and death.

Fortunately I’ve been able to work at home for nearly two years and my employer has taken very positive steps to help us all reduce risk. Alex is taking similar precautions. We’re mostly keeping ourselves to ourselves and having as much delivered to the house as we can. That’s all we can do and hope that coronarse passes us by. (But we’re still gonna spam up the internetz!)

See you in June, dahlinks!

Coronarse Virus 1

I haven’t blogged for five months – to be honest I can’t be all that arsed about things these days. But I’ve got some time on my hands over the next three months and I need to get one or two things off my chest.

Firstly, to any of you that are belly-aching about the UK government’s response to this bloody virus, STFU and take a long, cold, hard look across the pond. Bojo might not be your cup of tea, but he’s making a far, far better fist of this than that ignorant, dangerous tangerine tosspot in Washington.  There! That’s that said!

It is a fact that a national crisis will bring out the best in some people. Unfortunately it also brings out the worst in others. There is a line in the 1951 (and best!) version of A Christmas Carol in which the late Jack Warner as Mr Jorkin rebukes his colleague with the observation “We’re all cutthroats under this fancy linen, Mr. Snedrig.” The last two weeks have proven just how true that is. For all our technological and scientific advancement humans can still be feral.

The current spate of “panic buying” is misnamed – it’s not panic, it’s carefully calculated selfishness. It is also woefully and deliberately ignorant and all these sheeple have managed to do is to fill up the garage or spare bedroom. And why toilet paper, FFS? The virus makes you cough up a lung not shit yourself. From day one there never has been a shortage of arse-paper – one factory in Manchester churns out nearly 5 million rolls of the stuff every day on its own – about enough to wipe every arse in Greater London or clear up after one Katie Hopkins press conference. And that’s just one manufacturer – the Andrex puppy has three such factories  and that’s not even starting to count the stuff we import.

No! All these clowns have achieved is to fuck up the supply chain to a monumental degree. Just be sensible about things and take what you need and there won’t be a problem. Of course the looters don’t see it as a problem. They’ve got what they want and every other bugger can go screw themselves. The lack of common sense, decency or morality would be shocking but for the fact that it’s just one more example among many of human stupidity. I’ve been watching and despairing …

… and then I found this:

Two teenagers in South Yorkshire have been handing out care packages to vulnerable people.

Matty Merry and Sam Hornsby, who are both 17, have been giving out bags containing items such as porridge, toilet roll and teabags to people in the village of Harlington who are self-isolating due to the coronavirus outbreak.

Sam said: “I really advise people to do it if you’re actually able to and if you’re willing to do it because I think at this moment in time, we really do need to pull together as a community.”  Clicky.

… maybe humans have a future after all.

Six Weeks of THIS???

Just been watching the wind-up of the first reading of the election bill in the Commons. Basically just half an hour of ad hominem attacks on each other.

Soooooooo tired of all this Yah, Sucks, Boo behaviour and then one of them has the nerve to stand up on a point of order and say they should all be a model to the country during the coming campaign.

We’re doomed, I tell you!

Die in ignorance if you want …

… but don’t kill your kids with it!

A few days ago a friend on Facebook posted this devastating picture.

CaptureFor those lucky enough not to know about such things I’ll explain what it is. Rows and rows of children in rows and rows of iron lungs – victims of polio in 1950, they can only live by staying inside a machine which breathes for them. Medical science has come a long way since then. Modern ventilators are a fraction of the size and allow far greater autonomy. Oh, and vaccination has all but eradicated polio, and numerous other similarly grizzly, disabling and fatal diseases.

I must be one of a gradually thinning group of people who have seen at first hand what polio can do to a human body. In the house next door to where I was born and spent the first six years of my life lived a lovely woman by the name of Doris. She has long since passed away, but in her early years she contracted polio and it left her disabled for all her adult life.  She had a speech impediment. Her right arm was withered and she wore leg irons and a surgical boot, but could still only just walk as far as the outside toilet. For all that, she was a gentle soul who I will always thank for introducing me to plain chocolate! But the years of struggling against such disability took their toll and she died all to soon.

There are those on this planet who would take us back there! The anti-vaxers with their ill-conceived conceit that they are right and decades of scientific research, experiment and proven results are wrong. They tend to fall into two groups, both equally deluded and very dangerous in their beliefs.

The “vaccines cause autism” brigade. There was never any serious evidence to support that old chestnut. It came from a case study sample of only 12 children and was blown up out of all proportion. Besides, parents who use that argument are essentially saying that they’d rather have a dead child than an autistic one. Well, congratulations! By not vaccinating your children you’ve raised the prospect of the former by an order of magnitude utterly and completely out of proportion to any risk of the latter.

The “(insert deity of choice here) is my vaccine”. Well, good luck with that, but I’ll take science over prayer any day!

Anti-vaxers say that it is nobody’s business but their own. Wrong! Their irresponsible behaviour puts that child who is unable to be vaccinated because of health reasons at serious and unnecessary risk. Anti-vaxers say they have a right to decide for their own children. Wrong again! They have no right to decide that their child will die a horrible death from a preventable disease. Not vaccinating children in the face of overwhelming evidence of the benefits amounts to child abuse, and should be punished accordingly.

Seriously?

I’ve just read the Parliamentary Standards Committee’s report on Keith Vaz. (Yes, I know I need a life, but they don’t make ‘em in my size!)

Vaz was for years the Chair of the Home Affairs Select Committee – in which capacity I’ve seen him be quite impressive and magisterial with people who haven’t quite towed the line. He rather impressed me with the way he dealt with Camilla BatmanDooDah’s histrionics when Kids Company went tits up. However, if you’re going to present yourself as a champion of truth you’d better not have too many nasty little secrets in your closet.

Now, I’ve been a follower of politics for knocking on for half a century and in that time I’ve heard some absolute whoppers. But two rent boys in your flat at 11.30pm on a Saturday, you talk about having had bareback sex and then agree to pay for Class A drugs, all of which is recorded and you would then like us all to believe that they were only there to go through the Dulux catalogue with you?  Pull the other one!

The Committee was quite clear – they couldn’t give a toss about who does what with what and how to whom – even going so far as to remind us that paying for a toe curler is not illegal. It was his offering to stump up for some  Class A  and the rather pathetic excuses he then came up with which finished him.

Time for this humbug to resign!

Election

Well, at least a general election might knock some of those ceaseless christmas adverts out of the TV schedules – even though both make unrealistic promises about how wonderful our busy lives could be if we just voted Tampax …